Getting Lucky (1984)

The late lamented Paul Vatelli, who passed away from an AIDS-related illness just as he was hitting his creative peak circa 1986, frequently favored story over sex with several of his most lauded movies like Bodies in HeatStiff Competition and Sorority Sweethearts thusly constructed that their naughty bits could easily be toned down for ready made cable consumption.  With Getting Lucky, an affable titillatory trade-up of raunchy R-rated T&A fare like Porky’s predating American Pie, he uncharacteristically tipped the scales in the other direction with results that are actually none the worse for largely dispensing with needless narrative to focus on the fucking.

It’s the end of the school year and three graduates, or rather two and a conspicuously older hanger-on (no one in his right mind would have dared to pass off seasoned Eric Edwards as being of college age at this advanced stage of his adult career), are looking to get laid.  While Johnny (Edwards) is having Tammy (the actor’s then real life wife Rene Summers looking positively ravishing) in the backseat in more ways than one, his obnoxious pal Moon (prime ’80s stud meat Craig Roberts) – so nicknamed for his annoying habit of flashing his friends – tries to divert his attention after being blown off by specialty big bust model Barbara Alton who prefers an extremely youthful Marc Wallice, ill-advised and thankfully soon discarded moustache and all.  Both scenes feature well-captured rear entries in a trend to be continued.  Uncredited achingly gorgeous Angel West, star of the Jerome Bronson soundalike Getting Ready, appears all too briefly bestowing a tenderly tentative BJ on Eric’s well-travelled wand before it’s off to the races.

Sex scene set-ups are often ludicrous like Moon being picked up by a van full of fine female flesh who want to equal their friend’s claim of having made a guy cum ten times over the course of a single night.  Since they didn’t have anything else planned, Misty Dawn (aka Mrs. Laurie Holmes, spouse to King John), redhead Rose Marie (among the prettiest of all ’80s starlets) and single shot Mary Ann Richards do their darnedest to drain the unlikely superstud of his vital fluids in three certifiable cum shots, the supplemental seven left to audience imagination.  Just as silly is Johnny’s braggy bet with hookers Janey Robbins (always value for money) and honey-coated Shanna Evans (star of Ken Gibb’s Fleshdance) that whoever gets the most out of their sexual union should pay the bill.  Fortunately, both scenarios yield top notch turn-on value.

Lovestruck Daryl (goodlooking enough for gay porn one shot Todd Keller) is fighting frustration over girlfriend Marcia (adorable Cynthia Brooks from David Frazer and Svetlana’s Bad Girls III, otherwise shown to good advantage in Gibb’s early Ginger Lynn vehicle The Sweetest Taboo) who refuses to put out, sending him sulking into the night.  Jaywalking absent-mindedly, he’s nearly mowed down by a Limo carrying Duschka, the Dutch dominatrix featured in Vatelli’s niche-oriented House of Pleasure and Kim Christy’s dispiritingly dire Sulka’s Daughter.  Although that close-cropped platinum do still screams butch dyke, a softer make-up and frilly feminine attire should broaden her fanbase as she initiates the squeamish Daryl with a master’s (mistress’s ?) hand.  Feeling somewhat apprehensive for unceremoniously casting his good girl aside, he rushes to her house the very next morning to make sweet tender love in a couples-friendly capper to this nearly wall to wall wankfest.

Adhering to self-imposed high standards in terms of production, Vatelli took a break from shooting his own stuff, leaving the already revered Jack Remy in charge.  A master of mood, Remy devised his lighting for cinema screen exposure, which will inevitably draw the critique from audiences acquiring Caballero‘s dimly duplicated DVD that it lacks that all-important clarity.  There’s even an original soundtrack containing several songs that stick in the mind by D’Artagnan who would subsequently work on Edwin Brown’s well-regarded Every Woman Has a Fantasy and its near-equal sequel.

Directed & written by Paul G. Vatelli. Produced by Vatelli & Ted Gorley for Swedish Erotica. Photographed by Jack Remy. Music by D’Artagnan. Edited by Gilberto Ciro. Starring Cynthia Brooks (as Tiffany Willis) (Marcia), Rene Summers (as Lauren Walden) (Tammy), Eric Edwards (Johnny), Craig Roberts (as Greg Ruffner) (Moon), Todd Keller (Daryl), Dushka (Rich Bitch), Angel West (Johnny’s Graduation Girl), Janey Robbins, Shanna Evans (as Beth Fix) (Hookers), Rose Marie, Misty Dawn, Mary Ann Richards (Van Girls), Barbara Alton (as Ann Whiting) (Bigbreasted Coed), Marc Wallice (Breast Lover), Cara Lott (Abusive Bar Patron) & Don Hodges (Rich Bitch Chauffeur). Running time : 81 minutes.

Too cool for school : several years their senior, Eric Edwards can still hang out and party with horny high school graduates

By Dries Vermeulen

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