The Grafenberg Spot (1985)

The Grafenberg Spot (1985)

Their tabloid-tempting existence on the verge of inspiring plentiful passionately perused biographical accounts, including (but not limited to) John Hubner’s Bottom Feeders and David McCumber’s X-Rated which in turn inspired the TV novelty showcase Rated X for real life siblings Charlie Sheen and Emilio Estevez, the Mitchell Brothers returned to the roots of an early adult subgenre they ironically never practiced in the first place for their final stand in the face of home video encroaching upon dapperly dwindling porn theater attendance. Affectionately referred to in hindsight as “white coaters”, these pseudo-documentaries occurred on the hinge of the ’60s and ’70s, providing excuse by way of “socially redeeming value” for their graphic displays of fleshy wares through expert explanations from doctors and scientists. Only the gullible, which apparently encompassed contemporary legal instances, bought into the claim that these epics intended to enlighten rather than excite their audience’s lowly lusts. Though tapping into science fact to a degree, exploiting then topical research on the hitherto unknown (and since dismissed as unproven) eponymous female pleasure center by Dr Ernst Gräfenberg, the mischievous Mitchells obviously regaled in spoofing this outdated fornication film form with the girls’ gushing climaxes – achieved via water hose and muscle control (looks like someone’s been doing their Kegel exercises !) – drowning out Annette Haven’s deadpan delivery of pompous platitudes.

Sun-kissed California gal Leslie (tanned ‘n’ taut superstar Ginger Lynn) has apparently found the love of her life in fun loving furry Michael (Harry Reems) who’s suddenly repelled when she lets loose a massive stream of female ejaculate – which he mistakes for, well, you know… – during oral interaction, drenching his textbook porn mustache in the process. Unable to cope with a girlfriend who loses bladder control when aroused, or so he thinks, Mike heads for the hills. Poor Leslie seeks much-needed professional help from glamorous Dr. Elaine Reynolds (Haven) who shows her the ins ‘n’ outs of female anatomy with the eager assistance of both fellow patients and staff. The Mitchells have thrown in a sly industry inside joke when Leslie explodes in orgasm at Doc Reynolds’ expert vaginal manipulation, providing a unique facial for genre goddess Annette who insisted on a notorious contractual clause against such “demeaning” activities throughout her long and distinguished carnal career !

Counseling is equally required for Michael on the outside so the good doctor pops round for an intimate show and tell, leaving the old guy so hot and bothered he just has to join in a coupling already in progress between best buddy Rick Savage and his main squeeze Traci Lords, removed from all American release prints (yet still gloriously present in the European cut) due to the latter notoriously turning out to have been underage when shooting took place. Not meaning to gloat at the expense of my stateside carnal compadres but, should you ever get the opportunity to see the flick in its entirety, please pay close attention to the double penetration portion contemporary critics were raving about and note that it’s most definitely Ginger’s gorgeously dimpled buttocks substituting for La Lords’s nether regions !

Taking Elaine’s advice, Mike visits an out of the way sex club (actually, the infamous O’Farrell, Jim and Artie’s home away from home) for further demonstrations in the art of squeeze box squirting. Having witnessed the stage show put on by Nina Hartley and Fanny Fatale (a/k/a lesbian activist and erotic filmmaker Debi Sundahl), he receives the in person follow-up from accommodating Lili Marlene with the indomitable Nina still managing to get a few licks in.  Adda girl ! Probably for no other reason than his being between prison spells at the time, the late ‘n’ legendary John Holmes makes a surprise appearance as a grease monkey welder, prompting a fun fantasy sequence with our girl Ginger somewhat uncomfortably wedged between His Hugeness and obviously intimidated one shot performer Thor Southern as Dr Reynolds’s assistant Randy, pressed into duty as an intermittent love interest for Leslie.

True to the template they set for themselves in their early ’70s classics like Behind the Green Door and Resurrection of Eve, the filmmakers tie up all remaining loose ends at the by now obligatory San Francisco orgy which at least allows the until then rather sparingly employed Amber Lynn to fully strut her stuff. A rollicking theme tune warbled by longtime Mitchell friend and legit nightclub chanteuse Sharon McNight (who directed Autobiography of a Flea for them) playing over a selection of genuinely funny outtakes sends viewers on their merry way, coasting on a hardcore high.

Directed and written by Artie Mitchell. Produced by Jim Mitchell for Mitchell Brothers Pictures. Starring Ginger Lynn (Leslie), Harry Reems (Michael), Annette Haven (Dr. Elaine Reynolds), Amber Lynn (Sandy), John Holmes (Mechanic), Lili Marlene (Sasha), Traci Lords (Tracy), Rick Savage (Rocky), Thor Southern (Randy), Nina Hartley (Sex Show Performer), Fanny Fatale a/k/a Debi Sundahl (Sex Show Performer), Rita Erotica a/k/a Rita Ricardo, Raven & Susie Bright (Sex Show Audience). Running time : 78 minutes.

Amber Lynn put the sizzle on screens both big and small throughout the ’80s

By Dries Vermeulen